Santa has gone cuckoo.

It’s been four years since anyone has seen Santa. Four years since any kid got any presents. There were Christmas trees and Christmas decorations but without Santa everything was useless and no one could predict the aftermath of what was to come.

The first year that Santa didn't show up, all the kids thought that Santa couldn't make it for some reason. But you know kids these days, they are well connected to each other through this magical communication voodoo called the Internet and very soon they found out that Santa didn't visit anyone. The milk and cookies remained untouched and nothing but thin air under the Christmas trees. (Well come to think of it, it was thick air since thin air rises to the top. Some science bullshit I read in my school textbook.)

Soon the kids around the world started thinking that maybe, just maybe they were not nice enough that year. That led to a wave of children being all good the whole year. There was no bullying in schools; none of the parents were troubled that year. You could see children on the streets helping out people with their daily chores and homework was completed before bed time but soon came Christmas time and everyone went to bed on time but there was no sign of Santa, same as last year. The second year was different. The kids all around the world went into deep depression and still no adult cared about the disappearance of Santa. A group of scientists tried reaching to the government, they tried to inform them the threat of having no Santa but the government was busy with oil, money and nuclear weapons. Everything went grey and no kid smiled that year. Parents spent all their money on clowns and counselors just to get an ounce of giggle out of their kids but nothing happened.

The third year was worse. Some of us called it the apocalypse. The children grew impatient of waiting for Santa. This led to children from all around the word to start a riot. There was no concept of NAUGHTY AND NICE anymore. They broke in toy stores and stole everything, there was graffiti on the streets and the kids started reading the dictionary just to find out bad words. No one attended school and no one slept on time. They ate sugar till they went hyper and after that they were unstoppable.  No parent could hit their child. The children made their own relief camp and just in case anyone got beat up by their parents, the children from the relief camps would make life a living hell for them.

By the fourth year, the government took serious action. Since they couldn't use force on the children, they made it mandatory for parents to buy presents for their kids and make them believe that Santa left them for the kids.

The world slowly started stabilizing and the children started believing in the naughty and nice pact. On this very Christmas, a miracle happened. There were more gifts under the trees, more than the parents bought for their children. There was a note on every extra present. They were all addressed to parents.

It read, “Christmas is not only for your kids, it’s for you also. I want all my children to be nice and believe in miracles. Spread the joy and Merry Christmas.

Love,

 Santa.

P.S. Don’t hate me haters. You guys need me more than ever and try leaving some brandy for me next time. It’s damn cold out there.”

I guess Santa has gone cuckoo in the head but then who cares. As long as I’m getting what I wished for.

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Christmas IS for kids as well as grownups. My parents still send me presents and they tell me that Santa sent them and I’m 21 now. I want to be their Santa as soon as I get done with my college. Keep your Santas happy. Keep reminding your Santas that you need them no matter how old you get.

 Merry Christmas everyone.  Stay warm. :)

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